i used to have regrets about anything and everything. every single (little) thing is enough to spoil my day. i always thought how nice it would be if i didn’t have to go through those things that i went through. i always thought that if i still had my father (and wealth), i didn’t have to go through those stuff.

thank god that mindset has long been gone. i finally understood the reasons why i had to go through tough times now. everything is for a purpose, and it takes a new perspective to see it.

my work is very tiring and the pay is really low. but i know i was given this job because i need it to train my temper and learn to be humble. one of the intern left because he felt the job was too lowly for him, but i guess its just that he didn’t manage to see the full picture yet.

things only happen once. if everything can be replayed, it doesn’t mean it will go your way still. the heart to persevere and learn—that’s what matters in times of happiness and trials.

there’s a story in the bible of the israelites crossing the jordan river under the charge of joshua. there’s another one of moses leading them across the red sea. but what differs in both stories is the timing when the waters finally parted for them to cross.

for moses: he took the staff that god had blessed on to strike the red sea, and immediately, the sea parted.

for joshua: it was said to him from god that those people carrying the ark of covenant  needs to take a few steps into the jordan river before god parts the sea. however, this did not happen immediately. instead, the waters upstream in a far distance near the city of adam stopped first. also, the waters downstream leading to the dead sea had stopped as well. but the part whereby the israelites were supposed to cross had not stopped yet (eventually it did of course). one interpretation of the meaning of this passage is that god is the god of already.

god of the already: you might be going through temptations and troubles, but do not worry, because you have already won the spiritual battle. it’s hard to believe but its true. whenever i pray, god moves tremendously.

one great testimony is my mother. she’s still a non-christian but she’s so open to listening to me telling her stories from the bible! haha! so happy that she’s found peace (she said that herself too) and joy from listening to the stories. 

Joshua 3

Crossing the Jordan

 ¹ Early in the morning Joshua and all the Israelites set out from Shittim and went to the Jordan, where they camped before crossing over. ² After three days the officers went throughout the camp, ³ giving orders to the people: “When you see the ark of the covenant of the LORD your God, and the Levitical priests carrying it, you are to move out from your positions and follow it. ⁴ Then you will know which way to go, since you have never been this way before. But keep a distance of about two thousand cubits^[a]between you and the ark; do not go near it.”

 ⁵ Joshua told the people, “Consecrate yourselves, for tomorrow the LORD will do amazing things among you.”

 ⁶ Joshua said to the priests, “Take up the ark of the covenant and pass on ahead of the people.” So they took it up and went ahead of them.

 ⁷ And the LORD said to Joshua, “Today I will begin to exalt you in the eyes of all Israel, so they may know that I am with you as I was with Moses. ⁸ Tell the priests who carry the ark of the covenant: ‘When you reach the edge of the Jordan’s waters, go and stand in the river.’”

 ⁹ Joshua said to the Israelites, “Come here and listen to the words of the LORD your God. ¹⁰ This is how you will know that the living God is among you and that he will certainly drive out before you the Canaanites, Hittites, Hivites, Perizzites, Girgashites, Amorites and Jebusites. ¹¹ See, the ark of the covenant of the Lord of all the earth will go into the Jordan ahead of you. ¹² Now then, choose twelve men from the tribes of Israel, one from each tribe. ¹³ And as soon as the priests who carry the ark of the LORD—the Lord of all the earth—set foot in the Jordan, its waters flowing downstream will be cut off and stand up in a heap.”

 ¹⁴ So when the people broke camp to cross the Jordan, the priests carrying the ark of the covenant went ahead of them. ¹⁵ Now the Jordan is at flood stage all during harvest. Yet as soon as the priests who carried the ark reached the Jordan and their feet touched the water’s edge, ¹⁶ the water from upstream stopped flowing. It piled up in a heap a great distance away, at a town called Adam in the vicinity of Zarethan, while the water flowing down to the Sea of the Arabah (that is, the Dead Sea) was completely cut off. So the people crossed over opposite Jericho. ¹⁷ The priests who carried the ark of the covenant of the LORD stopped in the middle of the Jordan and stood on dry ground, while all Israel passed by until the whole nation had completed the crossing on dry ground.